Dating for Marriage

I want to wish you the happiest New Year you’ve ever had.

If finding and keeping the man of your dreams — If marrying your Mr. Right is your New Year’s resolution for 2009 — Please let us help.

The Romance Trap Dating For Marriage System is ready and waiting for you.

Take care,

Gwen

Do you know what being present is? How can being present help you find the man of your dreams? Before I answer those questions, I want to get back to the apple.

Thank you for your questions and comments. It was an organic Arkansas Black heirloom apple.

When I wrote the post about the apple, I didn’t fully realize what had made my experience so profound.

Looking back, I found that the key element was that when I took that first bite, the overwhelming flavor helped me to get present. Being present is being fully in the moment. You don’t have any other thought in your mind other than the experience you’re currently in.

It is very easy to live life in the past or future. It’s where most of us spend our time.

“Why did I do that?” “Why didn’t he call?” “When will I find my Mr. Right?” etc…

Over the years, I’ve had periods of time when I was able to live completely in the present. During those times, I had amazing experiences and everything always worked out for the best. I was always in the right place at the right time. I could go on, but I’m sure you get the point. Being present is like being the luckiest person in the world. Everything falls away but the most important core issues. You’re in the “here and now”!

How do you become present? The quickest way is to breathe. Yes, breathe!

Right now, you’re sitting in front of your computer. Aren’t you? Then what you need to do is: take a deep breath. Now pay attention to how that breath feels. Can you feel it filling up your lungs? Now you want to let it out. How did that feel? Did you let it out in a big huff or did you slowly release it?

Try it again.
Big deep breath.
Pay attention to how it feels.
Now let it out slowly and experience how it feel to be in control of your breath.

Wasn’t that empowering? Even though breathing is something that is automatic, it is also something that you can control! Oh, and by the way, you’re now present!

Did I answer what being present is and how it feels well enough for you?

Let’s move on to how it can help you find the man of your dreams.

When you’re present, you’ll be better able to detect if the man you’re considering as Mr. Right is really a Mr. Wrong or the real deal.

You know how when you’re with someone new, how they can take your breath away. I know it may seem like, “Oh, he’s the one”, but if he’s taking your breath away, you aren’t making very good decisions. Step back and do the breathing exercise we just did together. Go to the bathroom if you have to.

Now after you’ve gotten your breath back, you can look at him more objectively.

When you’re present, you’ll be able to tell if he’s B.S. or if he’s worth giving a second chance. Think back to all those guy’s you’ve given second and third chances to even when they’ve broken your trust and your heart.

Don’t waste your time with Mr. Wrong! Being present will help you spot him on the first date so you can move on to finding your Mr. Right.

Take care and stay present,

Gwen

When I’ve asked the few people I know who believe they’ve found true love - there is a very similar story about the journey.

You’re going to travel on an unpaved road and often into uncharted territory.  

There will be potholes, cracks and sometimes you’re going to get stuck in the mud in a “place” you’ve never been before - and nobody told you even existed. - but if you keep going you learn how to avoid the pitfalls and you begin to trust yourself as you continue to explore how you define love.  

Each time you face a challenge or setback on your journey it will result in your heart becoming wider - as long as you don’t give up and quit.  You need to think about what you’re going through as a series of tests - to see if you are able to handle the much greater flow of energy true love brings with it.  

As you build your inner strength you’ll begin to face life with a wide open heart - this is when magical things begin to happen:

You’ll be given opportunities that will lead to valuable insights and wonderful revelations about the mysteries of love.  You’ll become fearless about taking those chances that can bring you closer to what you seek. 

You learn to trust the voice deep inside when it urges you to take the next step.

As you allow yourself to trust yourself more completely you begin to surrender to the inner knowingness that true love is your destiny.

When that happens it’s just a matter of time.

What you want and need will appear in your life because you will be ready to recognize it and act upon it.

That’s when you’ll begin your journey into the infinite degrees of true love.

True love isn’t a destination or a goal -  it’s the continuation of the journey you began the day you were born.

-Bob Baran

The other day, I bit into an apple.

What do you think my experience was? Was it negative? Did I run into a worm? Or was it positive? And why the heck am I writing about biting into an apple?

My experience was so intense that I could only eat a few bites.

This was one of those fancy apples you find at the health food store. Organic and expensive — it was the best apple I’ve ever bitten into. If fact, it was so flavorful that I was satisfied with only a few bites. This apple was dense, firm and the flavor! I’ll try to describe it.

When I bit into this apple my first impression was, “Wow, this is firm!” I could only get a small bite. Then the flavor filled my mouth. It started out tart, then became sweet, finally lingering with the most appley taste I’ve ever experienced.

So you could say that my experience was positive. Very Positive! But here’s the catch. It was so good, I was overwhelmed. Yes, overwhelmed by an apple! I thought, “I need to cut that up in thin slices so I can savor it.” But I didn’t.

Why not? You may ask. Part of me was afraid that the next time it wouldn’t taste as good. Part of me was still satisfied with the small taste I’d had. And part of me didn’t believe I had had the experience that I just described to you. How could an apple be that good? If that’s what the serpent tempted Eve with, I’m not surprised she succumbed.

A couple of days went by. I keep looking at that apple in the bag in the fridge. I kept thinking, “I really should eat more of that apple.” Finally, this morning I broke down and I took another couple of bites. What was my experience? Exactly the same!

As I sit here writing, the appley taste is still lingering in my mouth and I wonder why I waited so long.

What does this have to do with relationships or finding your Mr. Right?

I’ve observed a number of women and yes, even myself have experienced all of the overwhelm that I had with that apple, with a man. Maybe something like this has happened to you in a new relationship.

Part of you was afraid that the next time it wouldn’t be as good.
Part of you was still satisfied with the small taste you’d had.
And part of you didn’t believe you’d had or even deserved such a wonderful experience.

Why do we women run away from something that is wonderful? Is it too good to be true? Is it better than you think you deserve or you expect?

The message I wanted to convey with this post about biting into an apple is that, it’s okay to have amazing experiences. Don’t be afraid of them and allow yourself to be open to something astonishing happening this holiday season.

Merry Christmas!

Gwen

P.S. I’m going to go get some more of those apples before they run out and put them in everyone’s Christmas stocking. I’ll find out the name of them. Email me if you want to know what to look for: gwen@romancetrap.com

Have a safe, fun and extraordinary Holiday!

Just Imagine what it would feel like to be in the arms of the man of your dreams…

Now imagine it’s next year at this time.

If you are ready, willing and serious - this can be the last Holiday Season you’ll ever spend alone.

But, as in all things in life it really comes down to choice, desire and belief.

Do you have the courage to believe it’s possible?

Do you really want to be in “his” arms next year at this time?

Are you ready to make the choice that begins the transformation which will get you “there” from where you are now?

Christmas is a time of renewal.

Open your heart and let yourself dream the most beautiful of dreams.

Spending the rest of your life in a deeply connected and deeply committed, profoundly loving relationship.

We believe in love.

Merry Christmas

-Bob and Gwen Baran

Are you going to be alone for the holidays?

Would you like this to be the last Holiday Season that you spend alone?

One of the reasons so many relationships begin around the holiday’s is because people don’t want to be alone during this time of the year.

The other reason is because it is easier to meet other single individuals due to all the holiday parties. There are more opportunities to circulate and be introduced to friends of friends.

Remember, you’re at most only 3 degrees from the man of your dreams. Read that post here…

If you’re tired of being alone you have to stop hiding yourself away! Read the article about keeping yourself out of circulation here…

We have a big video taping going on tonight so I’ll leave you to think about how to get yourself out and about to meet the man of your dreams this holiday season.

Take care and be aware so you don’t fall into the romance trap. I hope to hear great stories about how you met your Mr. Right — not another sob story about hooking up with another Mr. Wrong and how you’re alone and heartbroken for the holidays.

Let’s talk soon,

Gwen

Did you watch this video?

http://romancetrap.com/blog/2008/08/25/always-im-dreaming-music-video/

The man of your dreams is out there right now looking for you.

Get out and be visible so he can find you.

Love can be found even when it’s cold outside.

Until later,

Gwen